Let's Not Make This So Difficult

How many of us grew up being taught what we should believe without any real explanation (or at least a reasonable explanation) as to why we should believe it?  I suspect that to some degree this is true for all of us.  And you know what?  I don't necessarily think this is bad, with one very notable exception.  Religion.

Virtually every other subject has an accepted amount of personal preference.  My parents may be strong Democrats and may have taught me to become one, but if I later chose to become a Republican, they may be disappointed but certainly understanding of my views.  The same could be said about almost everything, from cultural views to health care to medicine to literally anything.  The reason is that, even if we feel strongly about our views, we understand that we are all human and every individual, like it or not, is entitled to his/her views.

Unfortunately, religion is the one exception to this, which is sad because it should actually be the "poster child" for this type of thinking.  You see, with regards to religion, the "we are all human" aspect doesn't apply.  By definition, we are talking about God, and in many people's minds God is the one thing we cannot question.  Now there may be rationale to that reasoning if it were the case that we knew everything there was to know about God, but of course nothing could be further from the truth.  In the grand scheme of things, we mortals know very little about this being called God, or Ala, or any of the other human generated names for this divine being.  Interestingly, because the staunch believers feel God is perfect and should never be questioned, they apply the same logic to our understanding of God, which, as stated above, is a far cry from being perfect.

For most of my life I was willing to dismiss this issue as nothing more than an annoying human characteristic.  In recent years, however, it has become harder to ignore the intolerance of staunch believers who insist that their views are right.  Never mind that this type of thinking has caused more conflict, wars, killing and destruction than any other single issue in the history of the world.  Never mind that so may people who believe they are absolutely right don't agree with each other, making at least one of them to certainly be wrong.  I think it's time for a little analysis.

Here is the fundamental problem:  When speaking of God, people believe that we cannot question or doubt anything we have been taught or we will fail in God's eyes.  We believe we must hold true to our faith and our beliefs, even to our death, and in many cases, even to the death of others.  Our belief in God is the one truly uncompromising issue in our lives.  However, we know that we as humans are not perfect and that there is a never ending learning curve for us with everything in our human world.  It is crazy to think that 2000 years ago people understood as much about biology, medicine, or the universe than we know today, because we have the benefit of 2000 years of added knowledge.  Yet for some reason we feel comfortable constraining our understanding about God.

If we apply this same logic to our belief in God, it means we must also admit we were wrong about some of our beliefs, and we cannot allow ourselves to do that.  Let's use the Catholic Church as an example simply because I am a Catholic (to be clear, the same issues hold true for all religions and faiths).  If the Church insists we follow a belief, then later admits they were wrong, it brings into question all the beliefs they hold, which is unacceptable to them.  Which means we are not allowed to grow in knowledge of our faith like we do in literally everything else.  However, we all know the Church has been wrong on many things.  People were once imprisoned for stating the earth is not the center of the universe.  We've known for a long time that that is just silly.  The Church was finally forced into admitting that.  And there have been so many other examples as well.

Is it bad to be wrong?  Of course not!  In fact, it's human.  But not when it comes to our faith.

The dilemma is, of course, if you cannot firmly hold to your beliefs, what is the basis for our belief at all?  Little by little things change until our faith isn't anything like it once was.  On the other hand, if what we believe is in fact wrong, how can we ever grow past that and move toward a truer belief?

This is a tough predicament.  However, it is a predicament we humans have created for ourselves.  These "beliefs" we are so passionate about rarely form the core teachings of any faith.  Again, speaking from a Christian perspective, I would recommend that we turn to the source of our faith, to Jesus himself.  What did he say about this sort of thing, about holding fast to rules and dogma?  Interesting, he didn't say anything about it.  Not one thing.  He taught that God is love, that we should love God, and that we should love all people.  What did he say about the sun revolving around the earth?  Com'on man!  He didn't waist his time with such trivial things.  What did he say about gay marriage?  Well, believe it or not, he said nothing.  Granted he didn't endorse it, and I for one cannot say what he thought about it.  But I can say that, according to the New Testament, he didn't comment on it at all.  And you can go through virtually any issue we struggle with today and the same thing will apply; Jesus said God is love, we should love God, and we should love all people, period.

I find it ironic that the staunch believers who attempt to dictate our faith do not even follow the teachings of the person they base all their beliefs on.  Well, I actually do read the Bible, and I actually do believe in Jesus, and I choose to follow his teachings before I listen to any of the zealots who are telling me what is right or wrong.  Why is this so difficult?  It shouldn't be.  For me, it's the simplest thing in the world.

Maybe We Should Just Stop

Sometimes I can't help but look around me and think that things are really screwed up.  I mean, I am an optimist at heart and I believe I have a positive outlook on life, but there are some really weird things that happen on a regular basis.  I'm not talking about the truly horrible events like hurricanes, tornadoes, etc.  They are tragic, but they are part of nature and beyond our control.  I'm talking about the things we humans do that absolutely are within our control.

We all have times when we think about how complex many of the world's problems are.  We don't even consider it a bad thing when politicians or business executives lie to us.  In fact, we understand it and at times even believe it's the right thing to do.  And it's not just on the high levels; bullying is becoming a serious problem with our youth, divorce is at an all time high and climbing, good parenting is becoming a lost art.  And don't get me started on organized religion.  That is becoming as messy and ambiguous has political views.  Who knows what to believe?

We have become a "me first" society.  In truth this has been happening for two generations, but the full effect of this evolution is not impacting all of our lives.  Managers layoff workers to help their bottom line look better, even if the company is doing well.  Parents want to fire coaches if their kids don't get to play as much as they think they should.  And oddly, administrators usually listen to them.  For some reason we can't stop bullies from making someone's life miserable in our schools.  Married people have affairs and often think they are entitled to do so because their marriage isn't as strong as it once was.  People are no longer accountable for what they do.  People are no longer committed to anything besides their own personal interest.  And the worst thing of all is, there seems to be nothing we can do about it.

Well, I have an idea.  Let's just stop.  After all, we are human beings with free choice, right?  So let's make the right choice.  Given a choice to lie or tell the truth, let's tell the truth.  If our leaders can't figure that out, let's vote for someone who can.  Given a choice to bully someone or not, let's not.  If we are in position of authority, let's stop people who don't seem to get that.  If I have a strong spiritual belief that some religious authority thinks is wrong, I can believe it anyway.  We know what is right, so let's do what is right.

Oh, but it's not that simple you say.  Well, in the vast majority of cases, it absolutely is that simple.  Do what's right simply because it is right.  Be honest because it is right.  Work hard because it is right.  Be fair, be helpful, be charitable, be caring, simply because it is right.  Is that naive?  I don't think so.

Shangri-La

I have been to Shangri-La.  Of course, we all know what Shangri-La is, right?  Well, probably not.  For the literary minded people out there, you will recognize Shangri-La as the utopian community in the 1933 novel Lost Horizon by James Hilton.  It's actually a very good story if you haven't read it.  Of course, being that the book is a fictional story about a fictional place, I could not possibly have been to that Shangri-La.

For the more philosophically minded people, you may know that "Shangri-La" has become a metaphor for a place of true peace and tranquility.  Given that, it is in fact possible to go to that place, Shangi-La, at least metaphorically.  We all have our favorite places, and for me there's nowhere better than our lake cabin.  But in truth, it would not be accurate to call even our cabin utopian.  But, to be sure, I have indeed been to Shangri-La.

So where is this magical place of total peace and tranquillity?  I suppose one could say it isn't actually a place per se, but more of a state of mind; you can create your own Shangri-La by putting your mind at peace.  One could also say it is everywhere, for much the same reason.  If you are truly feeling at peace, it really doesn't matter where you are.  That's why all those goofy people sitting on mountain tops can be so peaceful while appearing miserable to us.  One thing is certain; if you cannot find happiness where you physically are right now, you won't find it by going someplace else.

And that's how I know I have been to Shangri-La.  I loved the town I grew up in, but right after high school I went into the navy.  I went to a number of places and I loved them all.  Shortly after I got married I had to move to San Diego, and I really loved it there (not much not to love about San Diego!).  I have had business trips from Hong Kong to Mexico and all over Europe, and I thoroughly loved every place I went.  The biggest test was that for the past two and a half years I had to live away from my family in Plano Texas (definitely not the same as San Diego).  While there were obvious difficulties, for the most part I truly enjoyed it.  Now I'm back home, and of course I have my lake cabin, and like I said, there is nowhere better than that.

So where is Shangri-La?  For me, I carry it with me where ever I go.  It is every place, it is no place, it is my place.  Maybe it is purely a state of mind.  If it is, I wonder why more people don't choose to go there once in awhile.

Lighten Up

Time to lighten up from the last posting.  Today is Friday before the Labor Day weekend.  There are not too many better times throughout the year than that.  It's near the end of the work day and I will be heading to our lake cabin with my entire family, including my wife, three kids, one son-in-law, two almost kid-in-laws, and a granddaughter.  The weather should be beautiful and all seems well with the world.

You know, I'll bet it would only take a few minutes to find some depressed person to bring me down from my current euphoric feeling.  Why do you suppose that is?  If I were to find one of these depressed people, it's not likely I would be able to lift that person's spirits, but he/she could easily bring me (or anyone) down.  And by a "depressed person" I'm not talking about someone with serious issues that they are struggling with.  I'm talking about the pessimistic whiners who are never happy about anything and seem to be in a perpetual state of gloom.  There are so many of these people, and for some reason they seem to possess some kind of power over the rest of us.  It's kind of a said statement about all of us.

Well, not today.  I'm flying high and I'm not going to be brought down by any of the whiners.  Oh, but what if I do run into one of them?  Could I be strong enough to resist their gloomy ways?  Hmmmm.  There's the door...if I bolt now I can get out of here before a whiner accosts me.  Oh, oh, there's the company whiner coming down the hall now!  Gotta go!

Is Marriage for Everyone?

In my first blog for nearly a year I wanted to write about something controversial. Well, how about this? In November, Minnesota (and I don’t know how many other states) is going to vote on the issue of legalizing, or more accurately recognizing, same sex marriage. There can’t be too many issues more controversial than that.

This is controversial from a number of aspects, but the issue I want to address is how a person, any person, should deal with such topics. More specifically, how do we decide what is the right thing to do? Do we make our decision based on our feelings? Do we research the issue in search of some precedent? Do we allow ourselves to be influenced by any of the multitude of strongly opinionated organizations that continue to speak out on this? So many questions, it’s hard to know what the right approach is. Or is it?

I just came from church (Catholic) where the priest reminded us of the Church’s position on this issue and that as Catholics we are expected to support that position, which creates an interesting dilemma for me. I have been Catholic for my entire 56 year life. Fundamentally I believe in the faith, and I certainly respect the Catholic Church’s (or any church’s) view on this or any other issue. I mean, if the Church doesn’t speak out for what they believe in, who else will?

The problem is, of course, is that this isn’t a church issue. Oh, but it is say the zealots! This comes right from the Bible! While it is a very debatable point as to what, if any, teachings about gay marriage come from the Bible, that’s not even the point. We have something called the separation of church and state in this country, and most would consider that to be one of the key aspects of our constitution that has made us great.

That’s true, agree the zealots, but as a person of faith, I am still expected to support my faith openly and with commitment. Hmmm, sounds like a good point. In fact, as a younger man that argument was used to influence me many times. Now, though, I have to ask, “What does it mean to be a person of faith?” If I blindly vote the way my (or any) religion tells me to, am I supporting my faith, or acting as a robot without really being part of my faith? Am I allowed to make a decision, or are all my decisions predetermined because I belong to a religion? And let’s face it; all religions, including the Catholics, have evolved their teachings throughout time, so committing to a decision based on religious views can be a bit risky.

But to be fair, I do want to be true to my faith, and I do respect my religion. Why would I be part of a religion if I wouldn’t be willing to support them on critical issues?

On the surface, this is a tough question. But in truth, it’s actually quite simple. The fact is, when dealing with religion, faith, God, and morality issues in general, there is very little black and white. For most of us, we struggle with moral issues all the time. Divorce, abortion, contraception, the death penalty, and on and on. These are not simple issues. Oh, they may be for the zealots, because they seem to know exactly what is right and what is wrong. Unfortunately I have not been given that gift of knowledge and I actually have to think about these things.

So for anyone looking for an absolute black and white answer to any controversial issue, including gay marriage, here is what I have to offer; I simply don’t know. And the fact is, neither does anyone else.  But I do know this; there was a man 2000 years ago that modern day zealots think we should listen to, and he taught two fundamental things; we should love God and we should love all human beings. This individual was the least judgmental person ever to live. That we should listen to him is the one thing I can agree with the zealots on, with the difference being that I think we should actually listen to him and not package his information in a way that supports our own beliefs.

I know one other thing as well. I know one of the best days of my life is when I got married, and every part of my life has been different because of that. Who am I to say that I, or anyone, can deny that experience to anyone else? Who can, in good conscience, walk into a voting booth and decide that a large number of people do not have the choice to be happy. Of course the zealots do, because they know more than the rest of us.

Are people allowed their personal views on moral issues? Of course, and thank God our country guarantees them that right. But can we dictate our personal views through legislation? The very principle of our country says that we should not.

I would love to see the clear cut line between right and wrong so that decisions would be easy. But clear cut lines do not often exist in our imperfect world. What I want more than anything is for everyone to have the chance to live their lives to the fullest. Who could possibly deny that to anyone? Who would even want to?

I'm Back!

Wow. I was just looking at my blog and realized I haven’t written anything since November of 2011. Unbelievable! Although, to be fair, it has been one hell of a year.

I’m sure all of my faithful followers have missed me. Of course, that assumes I ever had any faithful followers in the first place, which is not a good assumption at all.

I guess I’m one of those guys who needs to blog once in a while. Not sure why, probably just so I can say what I want without anyone challenging or interrupting me. In any case it’s time for me to fire up the blog machine and start putting some things out there. I actually have a couple of ideas I will be writing about very soon, but this short blurb is largely to see if I even remember how to do this.

So stay tuned. Exciting (and controversial) things are on their way.